What has 3 holidays… colder weather and darkness… much travel and traffic…and greater expenses?   You got it… 

The holiday season may be somewhat of a “ mixed blessing”  for many of us.  While it is a time of family and religious events, it may also be a time for travel, expense and increased stress.  This year especially with the economy in questionable condition, the strong possibility of a war in Iraq and the worry about terrorism  we as a country  and each one of us as individuals are under a unique type of stress.  The following article may provide some helpful hints…

What many people don’t realize is that the two-month period between mid-November and mid-January may be considered one of the most stressful times of the year.  The three major holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas/Chanukah, and New Year’s, represent family-focused events.  If families have experiences a transition (death, divorce, move, financial change) it may be felt with greater impact at this time of year as families gather in a new configuration.  The cold weather, in combination with less sunlight, may leave people feeling more vulnerable to low feelings and less energy.  Simple travel to the stores and malls often becomes an arduous task given the hordes of people who are attempting to do their holiday shopping.  Traveling out of town to visit friends or relatives may be good in theory, but tough in reality.  And, anyone understands that this time of year brings with it increased financial demands, be it gifts, travel, new winter clothes, home heating expense or a variety of other commitments.  With respect to children, it is a time of year when they have a long school vacation that is too short to build in other programs such as camp or summer school, but long enough to leave them feeling unstructured and indoors while their parents feel stressed.  Further, college kids may come home with a few of their new found bad habits, such as eating and sleeping at any and all hours.  The holiday season represents another area of stress for those who are attempting to deal with an addiction to food or alcohol as the many holiday festivities are celebrated heavily with both commodities.  For many who are working full-time, planning festivities, shopping, carting the kids around, visiting relatives (or having them visit us), the anxious and agitated feelings that we may experience around this time of year do not compare with the fond memories that we may have from our childhood.  This may generate some feelings of inadequacy and guilt.  Finally, there may be a letdown after the holidays are over, as we face two to three more months of winter, the bills accrued from the season and a certain level of exhaustion.

The goal of this article is not to make the holidays more depressing, but rather to help people acknowledge the work involved with this important time of year and to suggest the following strategies that may make it less stressful:

• Be aware of the stress involved at this time of year and don’t beat yourself up with guilt if you feel it.
• Do your shopping early (before Thanksgiving).
• If you are providing one of the holidays, try to be a guest another one.
• Only travel out of town for one of the holidays.
• For large families, do a grab bag gift giving rather than having to buy individual gifts for each member.
• Do not make New Year’s resolutions, as this is a very difficult time of year to institute new changes. 
• Instead, set New Year’s goals… and develop plans, strategies and timetables for accomplishing the goals throughout the year.
• If your family has experienced a transition, try to make the celebration very different than in the past, rather than try to replicate “how it used to be.”
• In July, begin a holiday fund that you can use to defray the increased costs of the holidays.
• Between mid-January and mid-February, plan a 1-2 day “vacation,” where you just take a day off to rest, reorganize and reflect on the upcoming year.
• Try to give thanks and appreciation for what we have… not what we want.

Wishing you the best for the holidays…